Halloween is MomBrain’s favorite holiday, not least because she gets to wear her fuzzy kitty ears in public. Plus there’s the spectacle of Amazing, Never Before Seen Crazies, some of whom are wearing fuzzy kitty ears. Today was no exception. Some of the things we saw:

Spiderman, half asleep and sucking on a pacifier.

Two priests holding hands.

Cat Woman, doubling as our waitress at Johnny Rocket’s. She was lithe, Asian, young, and poured into shiny black leather. Snaps to the Big Guy for not staring, but I can’t blame him for noticing.

The Incredible Hulk in a screaming red-faced meltdown fit because his red balloon was floating away. The Hulk’s daddy promised to buy him a new one.

Bush and Cheney in jail suits.

John Kerry wearing a waffle.

In the beginning was the virus. And the virus had dominion over all living creatures, great and small. And the prophet said, “Behold. There is a great sickness upon the land.” And MomBrain said “No duh.” And the Little Guy said “Ha Choo.” And the Big Guy said “Hack Hack.” And Kitty said “Beow Beow.”

And thus it came to be that the Angel of Death passed over the land and smote the firstborn child of every family that did not have a pumpkin on its doorstep. And so MomBrain, in her own death throes, schlepped to the grocery store in her PJ bottoms and found a scraggly pumpkin in the picked-over pumpkin patch; a veritable Charlie Brown pumpkin. And it was good.